Nobody knows which way it's going to go and no one knows which way it should go. All we do know is that it will mean the end of the world.
If we vote Brexit everything will collapse. Already Barbara Windsor has committed suicide on Eastenders in anticipation of Brexit.
Our houses will be worthless.
There will be a third world war. It's going to be appalling.
Of course if we stay in we will be overwhelmed by 200 million people a week arriving on our shores. Most of them apparently from Turkey but not delightful.
I'm amazed you're not the spokesman for both sides.
I feel in a way that I am, I'm ready to be. I know that we don't know because I've been there before.
You've been a Tory MP.
And you know that they know nothing.
But the truth is nobody knows anything and I do remember 20 years or so ago we went through all of this and I was actually in the treasury on the day we came out of the European Exchange Rate Mechanism, standing at the back of the crowd with the present Prime Minister, David Cameron. We were office juniors. At the beginning of the day, there was this thing called Exchange Rate Mechanism, it was all part of joining the single currency.
Its OK, it's not The One Show, you can use some bigger words.
Don't interrupt Giles while he's doing his one man show.
We were all in favour for it or we were against it. The point of the story is this: The Exchange Rate Mechanism, we're in it but do we want to in it? 20 years ago we go into the office one day and the markets seem to think we don't want to be in it. Well as the day goes on we find the markets are acting against us. We put up the interest rates from 9% to 10% to 11% to 12% up to 15%
Well the point is this: at the beginning of the day we didn't know what was going to happen, while it was happening we didn't know what was happening and when it had happened we didn't know what had happened.
Yes this is the disappointing news that according to both the leave and remain camps, if you vote against them the world will go to hell in a handcart.
Something about DIY. People doing odd jobs around the house won't be able to do it if we leave Europe be cause... all the hammers will have to be handed back.
Yes, and the alphabet we have known for a thousand years will lose the letters 'B' and 'Q'. Everything is going up the spout!
I think it's worse than that, it was a metaphor. They said: "This is a DIY recession." They thought we'll depict it with DIY and everyone said: "Oh, that's really annoying." But that's it, it's "recession", "800,000 jobs go", "your house will be worth less". The only thing about that is young people all around the country are thinking: "Good, a collapse in house prices. YES!"
Yes this is David Cameron and George Osborne who drew a small crowd at a branch of B&Q. For context though there were three times as many people in the next aisle staring at plaster board. What did they base their warning of a recession on?
Well this is the 'independent' treasury report, commissioned by David Cameron and George Osborne with the brief "scare the hell out of everybody". It was a set of figures they put together which almost everybody has says is not true.
The statistics from the Institute for Fiscal Studies, it then turned out that this same institute had been receiving several million pounds a year from the EU. The trouble is we can't really trust anyone because the hyperbole has become hysterical.